I know it has been a year. What a shame. So much has happened and I could have shared it all.
Walker came down with strep and Hannah had bronchiolitis. bummer huh? Yeah well in the middle of all that a good friend called and said, ”did you hear?” I knew then that someone had died, but I was not ready for who. It was Samantha. As I write this I am still getting tears in my eyes. You see, Sam was four. Yep four.
She was a great kid. Big smile, bright cheerful, the apple of her parents eyes! Her mom is a force to be reckoned with. Yep, you guessed it, we knew Sam through Children’s Hospital. This is when I know that my life is not your “average” life. See I have a number of friends who have children who have disabilities of one sort or another. Many of us have had hard times when the doctors tell us we are not sure your child is going to make it through the night. Do you know what that is like? I do, and unfortunately a lot of other parents and friends of ours do too.
Being a frequent flyer at Children’s is love hate relationship. I hate it because every time I have to go there, I am reminded of things that are wrong or not “typical” with Hannah. I love it because without them I would not have Hannah. And yet, I would not be who I am without them. I have learned to take on the system and right wrongs. I have sat with other parents and cried, hoped, prayed and watch kiddo after kiddo defy the odds. I have seen doctors stand in utter confusion and then realize what the true problem is. I have seen doctors stand in utter confusion as my child who should not be here, be the top of her class. I have met the greatest people on the planet at Children’s. I have advocated and can quote Colorado health insurance codes. (ok maybe that isn’t one to proud about.) I realized that there was more to me then who I once thought. I think my friends would agree.
The reality is we all walk a different road. The key is who you walk it with. What are you going to do with what you are handed? See, most of my friends from the hospital would have never thought they would be where they are. I know Samantha’s mom never thought she would walk the road she has. Sam has given those of us who knew her a renewed purpose. To keep doing what we are doing and make the world a better place. I know it sounds trite but how do you deal with the death of a four-year old.
So I am better for all that has happened at Children’s. I will keep on, keeping on. I will continue to stand with my friends and visit them in the hospital. I will continue to do right by Hannah and try to find the best treatments for her. I will make sure that my kids remain a priority because the time I spend with them, will never be enough.
